This week I had my son’s birthday party, my other son had chicken pox, my partner peed me off (and I probably peed him off too!), I cooked dinner for friends and I had 2 pyjama days!!
hi today I'm doing my weekly catch up the last week a trip i did was about week and a half ago and it was my son's 5th birthday and the next day we were having the big party and it went really really well and I didn't get you stressed and everyone enjoyed themselves and this shows me how much more well well well I am this year then I was last year because last year I was like and this year I was like yeah cool so cool and yeah it went really good but the next morning I was so drained emotionally I was like I've got nothing else to give and I looked at my one-year-old and he was covered in chicken pox uh so I had to contact some of the parents with young children oh really sorry i didn't know because my little boy hadn't even like been ill or anything so i just i had no idea that he was gonna come up covered in sports and he got them so badly as well he was like covered so the next day it was a chilled-out day but we kind of stayed in all day and me my partner mmm like irritating each other so that evening sunday evening he decided to go and that peed me off because i was left there with the boy with chicken pox and the other two and i literally got no sleep for like three days three nights uh cuz eason eason is my baby he was like Tara nice skin throwing himself around the bed and it was really distressing to say I was absolutely exhausted I got the two old ones late to school on two days like half an hour late and we're never usually late and just because I've got no sleep I realized just how important sleep is because I felt so sleep deprived i felt like i was a zombie huh it's walking around I remember making dinner one evening I'm like stirring and I mean Amelia saying to me mummy you're falling asleep in the food I was just so tired and and my partner I didn't see I think the first three nights and which did peed me off but I have to remember that we're both in recovery and he can get stressed at times and I do remind myself of that the thing is our recovery we're both in recovery but our journeys are kind different like we both do different things for our recovery we both need different things we you know we're different people and yeah so I did understand and he came round I think it was on a Wednesday night maybe all the thursday and we sat down and we talked and he said he was sorry and I was like okay but I'm he was I just needed space I just needed quiet and I get that I do get that but sometimes all I need quiet and I don't get quiet and it just seems so unfair air because I'm a month three so I can't just get I need a bit quiet I'm off for a few days so yeah so we're kind like but we're okay we're okay and because I do understand that's the thing and I know he loves me and he loves the kids and so yeah it's all good but it was just one of those weeks really like just one of those weeks well I so exhausted and I got no sleep and yeah that really really really didn't help and what did i do at the weekend following weekend I had some friends round for dinner and I did lovely food because i love i love cooking for people i love it and i did um BBQ chicken and my special roast potatoes that are the best in the world and i won't tell anyone my recipe i did my homemade potato salad they're from love and this bean salad that I made and it's like say a five bean salad but I used about seven or eight different beans and and that went down so well they loved it why wouldn't they it's amazing uh and where else i boiled eggs easy what else did i do oh and then just like a big normal salad as well with have a card here when peppers and radishes and everything and it was so young and with the mary berry's source what one is its mustard or something my mum board down and i love it so I'll put that on it was really really nice and it was just nice just sitting enjoying food with friends and yeah it was just really really nice so that happened this weekend because my older too it's half-term they've gone to my mum's and so I've had really really relaxing two days the past two days baby went back to nursery today because he couldn't go last week because of the chicken pox so yeah that's why I'm doing videos today and I haven't done before now because I can't do them with him running around but yeah that yesterday and the day before right the day before was monday and i went to the gym came out all being great plated baby came home had a bath thought what should i do like pajamas on and i was in my pajamas at like two o'clock the afternoon and me and babysat open corner snuggle together like this snuggle d exam to my home and we put despicable me on and we watched all of it and he's so good because he's one is nearly 2 um yeah he's need him and we just SAT and watched the film together it was so nice and I did like little party food kind of like I did cubes of cheese and pineapple and stuff we just stop munching and it was so good and I can't remember the last time that I relaxed like that and it was so good I did it yesterday as well and we watched despicable me 2 and it was brilliant and also my jim-jams again it like two o'clock I'm living the dream I'm a rock star and that it was so cool about genomic I actually went to bed last night it for about half nine but night before i went to bed at eight o'clock i woke up at seven the next morning so I had a good 11 hours and I felt great yeah so great that I got back in my pajamas at two and did it again that are yes it was really nice I have I'm just recovering from the last party and I've now gotta start planning the next one because that's in a month time and it's kind of book like bouncy castle and hall and everything is booked so but I've gotta sort out all party bags than that because my little boy eason is turning to and my daughter amelia is turning seven on the same day they were born on the same day eason came on her fifth birthday so that is going to be a bigger party cuz I'm having one for the younger kids in the morning then I'm having that an hour break and then I'm going to have the big kid party so it's like two parties look I don't know why I do it next year I'm not doing that I'm going to do little small I don't know take them cinema take them out to eat something like that just a few close friends and yeah i've got all that so that will keep me busy and what else has happened nothing nothing I did a 12-step meeting today an na meeting which is first time in ages that I've done there I'm very aware that I need to do a video on step four because I've done one two and three and I'm lying not part of a 12-step fellowship anymore but i do believe they work and so yeah but anyway guys that is my week and i will be back possibly friday khouzam yeah friday so see you then lots of love to all I
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