hi beautiful people today I'm gonna do a
little weekly catch-up I think I only
did one a few days ago but I've had a
few things happen so I thought I'd do
another one as you can see I'm still sat
here I have tried to fix my wallpaper
let me show you can you see the big gap
I didn't line up properly
I've made it look such a mess never mind
I'm not a decorator I'm feeling much
better believe it or not I've still got
my cough I am feeling a lot better
I went for a baby scan today I'm having
a little girl so I have got a 7 year old
girl then I've got a five and a two year
old boy I'm having a girl so I'm really
chuffed I always said to everyone I'm
sure it's girl I I was 99.9% sure I was
having a girl and I was telling everyone
it's a girl it's a girl but everyone
thought was avoid but over is Riley and
I'm really chuffed I mean I would have
been happy either way to be fair it was
a boy I'd be just as happy but yes it's
lovely so I thought I would share that
with you guys
rights and what's going on my five year
old boy qiyam he isn't eaten properly he
was always a really good eater ate
everything and I'm sorry no tusen he
choose his Chuck and I didn't know
that's what he was doing to start with
here to come home from school his top is
where I would like I've used for a drink
what if you don't your top and then I
saw him chewing chewing to the point
that it's all where now he has never
done anything like this I've noticed
he's been slightly cleaner than usual
like we always have cuddles we always
have kisses we always tell each other we
love each other but it's like there's
been a change in him and I've noticed it
and I went to my mum's this past weekend
and I was
there and again key and just wouldn't
eat like food that he he was such a good
eater just eat everything and now it's
like no no no and I was thinking
something's got to have triggered this
but what could it be I've got to get to
the root of this and find out what's
going on um so I started going backwards
through the summer holidays no he was
right there and look at the beginning of
the holidays fine no cheering he was
eating fine
and we worked out it was my mum 60th we
went to the new forest I did a video on
it if you've watched and my daughter had
the accident jumping on the bed hit a
windowsill split all her lip came down
she had to go under general anaesthetic
and have like reconstructive surgery to
put her face back basically and I
remember in the morning when I was sat
with her I looked i sat there I'd just
come in the room and I was looking at it
and I blance round and Keon was sat on
the bed and I could just see him look in
now he's a really sensitive boy like and
he would be really really worried but
obviously it was such a panic it was
like just get I wanted to get Amelia up
to the hospital my little girls Amelia
Daisy and I was I want to Amelia Daisy
to go to the hospital and yes so like I
took her to the hospital obviously kids
they were my mom and his grandpa and his
uncle and during the day they would have
just been going oh she's fine key and
she's fought because we don't want to
worry he was only five and don't want to
worry him then obviously we came back
that night and I did a video on it again
I told you how sweet ki and was like
stroking Amelia Daisy's arm saying I
love you I love you I'm giving her
kisses on her arm and then I did my
video explaining I was worried am I
gonna get post-traumatic stress disorder
because I kept reliving here and then I
was worried about how it's affecting
Amelia
and now I'm kicking myself because I
think I should have been talked about it
with ki and I don't think we ever sat
down and actually talked about what
happened I think once it was done all
the fuss was made everyone was is Emilia
okay and I don't think we ever sat down
and and I'm really I'm really kicking
myself because me of all people I think
because like I've been through the whole
mental health I should have realized
that this is something that needs to be
talked about because he doesn't know
what's going on in a hospital he doesn't
know what going under general
anaesthetic is he doesn't know what
stitching like he has no idea as far as
he concerned they could have chopped her
open or all sorts and I don't know how
his little heads worked but it's since
then he's been chewing on his top and
that but I'm so glad that all of sudden
it was like a light bulb moment and I
thought if that so I went in yesterday
yes there was Monday yeah yesterday to
the family support worker at the school
and I've spoken to her and they're gonna
sit down talk with him but I literally I
felt so guilty all day cuz like my poor
little boy has really been struggling
with this and I didn't even know it I
was so busy thinking I was gonna suffer
with post-traumatic stress or my little
girl was gonna I just didn't think and I
feel really guilty about that but then I
know guilt isn't going to serve me any
purpose I've traced it back I kind of
think I know what it is now and I'm
gonna work on it and see what we can do
family support workers gonna have a chat
with my little boy maybe I'll see what
she says and then depending what she
says maybe I'll sit down and talk with
him yeah and hopefully like we can just
nip it in the bud now before before it
gets worse basically so I I'm happy I
know what it is but as a mom to think
that my little boys only five and how
the little mind works it's quite
upsetting because I don't want to think
of him stroking or worrying or you just
want them to have fun at that age and
just be childlike
the child and carefree and having fun
not getting anxiety and that because of
something that's happened but I will
keep you guys updated on that so I
thought I'd just have a quick check-in I
tell you having my girl hmm I'm gonna go
and do the school run now and then I'm
going to tell the kids so they'll be
really chuffed as well and yeah that's
it and then hopefully I'll be back to do
a video tomorrow I'm hoping I'll have a
guest speaker this week as well one of
my best friends Joe so fingers crossed
maybe tomorrow maybe Friday we'll see
that my loads loved you guys bye