hi guys today I'm going to do a facebook
request talking about borderline
personality disorder and hypochondria
because I've got requested to do this
and it's one that makes me feel a bit
embarrassed actually because I did used
to be a bit of a hypochondriac not just
with saying I was ill all the time
because I didn't really do that it
wasn't I was ill all the time when I was
ill I was really really you know like
worse than anyone else in the whole
world was and it's almost like that was
I wanted attention when I was ill ago
attention and it made me feel loved it
made me feel wanted and that's why I did
it
but there are a few times that I was a
hypochondriac
let me explain what I would do it's so
embarrassing I haven't told anyone this
before and like I was say having a
blazing round with a partner like
screaming and shouting in in the street
really angry and I used to get literally
so angry that I'd start like my
breathing would get faster and faster as
it does but I would throw myself on the
floor and like just pretend I'd passed
out or something
it's really sad but I did it a few times
I said like I don't know it was just
something in me that I just think I've
had enough I don't know I'm not just gay
huh
and I've lied it say then Department she
know we talk with you are literally like
play dead and I could hear everything
going on and I didn't know why I did it
but I did it I did it another time in a
nightclub and I've got in a fight and
it's like really really angry and us
getting in this fight and I somehow got
knocked to the floor and I was
embarrassed that I've got knocked to the
floor so instead of getting up I play
dead I just played dead and I just lay
that like and I remember thinking hold
your breath so people think it'll not
breathe it but you can only hold your
breath though I know I so then to make
it realistic haha
I'm not play dead again until I'm you
just kept it back and this would go on
and on and then eventually I think I've
done this long enough what happened what
happened but there it is
and so I did this yeah just sometimes
because I was embarrassed sometimes I
just want me to tension
yeah so because that's the thing with
BPD isn't it
we're crying out for help and people
might think oh she's such an attention
seeker hello yes yeah hang on just in
quick video I'm going out that's right
yeah that's thing yeah hello we're
attention-seeking give us some and when
we don't get it Oh we'll just do
something so we get it even if it's
negative they can come okay I'm gonna
leave it there I know that was a quick
video guys but I am going to hopefully
do some more probably tomorrow for next
week because the kids are back next week
so I've got them for a whole week there
on the holidays that would be fun but
yeah so I'm gonna probably be busy
taking them to the park buddy buddy ruff
but I will be back and I'll get those
videos done this week for you what are
you doing
the guys dancing trying to put me on
you're right guys love you all see you
next week I