There were times when I would try to develop my own way of recovery by fixing on things. When I did this I would distance myself from my loved ones and be quite cold and cut off from them.

hi guys invalidity of a video today that
I was asked to do ages ago by the lovely
Christina and she kind of asked me do
board liners just say they're trying to
reflect on themselves and find out who
they are can they then just cut out
their family and turn to something like
religion and then be completely cold
with those around them and so I thought
I'd answer that quickly today because
I've left it so long as well and I'm
sorry for that yeah I think we can
before way had DBT and I found recovery
I was constantly trying to find
something that could manage my emotions
help me cope and for me it wasn't
religion but I used a number of other
things so one I could get into my health
and fitness and I could start going to
the gym everyday eating really healthy
and buying coconut water
by the box loaded over to the house and
then becoming really cold with those
around me who I would then look down on
what you eat so unhealthily or you don't
even go to legit and I'll be really
judgmental and think you know this is
keeping me well but it never ever lasted
because it's not that's not recovery
don't get me wrong
eating healthily going to the gym that
can be part of your recovery but it's
got to be a small part that can't be the
whole of your recovery and you think
I'll throw myself into the gym throw
myself into eating healthy can hardly
fine because that just won't that won't
it might for a little time it might fix
you for a little time but eventually
those horrid feelings are going to come
up and something will happen and the
bubble that you're in will be burst and
you'll be back to square one I didn't
just kind of do it with the
I could go on like say reading lots of
self-help books and I'm gonna be real
spiritual this one duder when actually I
wasn't really being spiritual because I
wasn't giving a crap about those about
me basically like that became my life I
throw myself into something I could not
do things by halves
I had to it was like the be-all and
end-all I had to do this anyone else was
just getting in my way and I could be
cold with the people around me and but
in my head this was recovery but looking
back now is I didn't know what recovery
was I didn't know what I was supposed to
like never done DBT I didn't know that
recovery is one a process that takes
time I don't just pick up something oh
yeah this is fix me I'm great
it's something that I have to be working
to and it's also a variety of things
with DBT we have a motion regulation we
have interpersonal effectiveness we have
the mindfulness we have distressed
tolerance you know there is a little
right of combination and that's just the
DBT the DBT alone again isn't recovery
I needed one-to-one counseling I needed
to take my medication you know though it
was a combination it wasn't just the one
thing and when you come into recovery
from drugs and alcohol I did a program
called relapse prevention that was by
developed by a guy called Terrence
Gorski in America and again that teaches
you you need counselling you need your
health so that's eating regularly
getting a good night's sleep doing some
exercise you need spirituality whereas
you learn to be good to other people
look at yourself when you're doing wrong
you need to do something specifically
for your recovery like 12 steps 12-step
fellowship and helping others so even
like with that I mean that's not just
the only thing but it's a combination
it's not just one thing that can fix us
but very easily if because we're so used
to just being in pain and fingolfin as
soon as we find one thing that we think
is there I mean it doesn't have to be
religion it doesn't have to be going to
the gym it doesn't have to be self-help
it could be just hanging out in my race
oh that makes me feel better so I'm just
gonna do that all the time forget my
family forget the people that really
really love me this is what I'm gonna do
because this is working today and yet it
might work today it might but long-term
it's not it's gonna fail because you
need a variety of things so um yeah it's
like we just take everything to the
extreme and yeah we just want it we want
it and we want it now don't me and we
kind to do candlelit well can you let
the people around us suffer in that
process to find recovery yeah believe
that there guys bye
This transcript was auto-generated and therefore may contain mistakes.

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