hi my lovelies welcome back to my
channel if you are new I am Serena
recovery mum I am author of the big book
on borderline personality disorder guys
those of you that have bought my book
thank you so much I've had messages
recently of people saying they're trying
to get it and it sold out and this is
amazing so thank you so much thank you
so much as yeah it's really good it's
because literally we've done no
advertising so it is literally
word-of-mouth people saying I've read
this this is really helpful and other
people are buying it and it's like just
this is really good
say thank you I was hoping I'd be
uploading every other day this week I
have just been tired and I spoke to my
XD Darrin yesterday and he was like like
when you say tied is it a tiredness that
no matter how much sleep you get you're
still tired I'm like that's exactly it I
can get the sleep I can get an early
night
I could sleep 12 hours I'm still tired I
do think it to do with the current
situation that we're in so I set up a
new channel channel called family ticks
if you haven't gone on over and
subscribed do so and hit a notification
bell and I'm doing videos on there again
they're mint mental health based but a
lot of people have out there have never
had a mental health problem in their
life but due to lockdown they're
depressed they're anxious etc so that
channel focuses on the problems with the
current situation and again mental
health and in today's video that I've
put out on there I discuss the severe
tiredness that I've been feeling and I
think I found a cure at least from my
own
explain on that channel so today I'm
doing a video request and I got asked
can you recover from borderline
personality disorder without ever taking
any medication and first of all like
when you say recover I do say to people
there's there's no cure for BPD we know
that there's no cure but that's not in
it oh it's all doom and gloom there's no
cure so give up now because it's the
same I suppose with any or any of you
that have suffered addiction and gone
through Alcoholics Anonymous Narcotics
Anonymous cocaine anonymous will know
that they say once an addict always an
addict but you learn to manage these
symptoms and you might have never
touched a drug for 30 years but they say
you're still an addict because the
problem isn't the drinking or the using
or like with BPD the problem isn't the
behaviors they're the ones that get us
into trouble but that's not the problem
is up here it's within us and we can get
rid of those behaviors but the problem
still there and so we have to find a way
to manage it very helpful coping
mechanisms and that's the same with
addiction it's the same with BPD also
there is no current medication that's
someone with BPD that can like can take
that will make them better there's
there's no medication that you can take
for it believe it or not but I'm on
medication most people with BPD are but
that's for anxiety depression mood
stabilizers antipsychotics for those
intrusive thoughts so what the
medication does
it makes the other problems within us
because of BPD's often comorbid with
another disorder like anxiety like
depression by alleviating some of those
symptoms we can then be more like
inclined to go to a group therapy
session actually turn up and see a
therapist because if you're so anxious
and you're so depressed
you're intrusive thoughts are so bad
you're not going to want to go and sit
in a room people learning skills on how
to cope in life you're just not so
medication really helps us but really
really helps us because it can take the
edge off and allow us to engage in the
therapy that we need if you are someone
that's like don't want to take
medication never want to be on an
antidepressant never want to be able to
an antipsychotic fair enough and your
journey might be slightly tougher but if
you can get yourself along to a group to
learn DBT skills steps skills any of
these therapies that are out there for
BPD if you can get yourself along to one
of them and start actually putting those
things into action listening to what
they're saying practicing the skills
your tool you have just as much chance
of getting into recovery that's not
fully recovered because it's always
there and I've always said this and last
year was a huge eye-opener for me
because all my BPD traits came out last
year so badly and literally I could
probably go through and just take them
off for you and because last year was a
really bad year and that shows I've been
in recovery doing well I was like yeah
I've got this saw it I've sowed it then
I had like the incline going down
decline decline and it really kinda
showed me that the befit is there is
that is there it's how my brain is wired
up it's how like what I feel and I had
thought I was doing so well for so long
but maybe I just nailed it but I stopped
doing what I needed to do I just kind of
spaz maybe I got the arrogant like yeah
I've done here I'm alright and it's
everything that I teach you got is like
just know it's always there you've got
to manage it if you notice things and I
just stopped seeming to notice all the
little light the red flags going off
like oh you're kind of hitting towards
bad place and I just ignored it and I
had a year from hell I did have a number
of tough things go on last year I lost
my uncle and he was just so amazing like
I can't expend
litchi from when I was little baby all
the he was just you know one of those
uncles that you just absolutely adore
and I lost him last year and that was
really tough but had I been practicing
my skills like I said I would had I
still been checking my behaviors on a
regular basis maybe I I could have still
obviously the pain of losing someone
oughta still gone through that but it
wouldn't have meant disaster for me it
wouldn't mean right full-blown crisis
for the next few months and that's how
it very much was last year because even
in my book I have a whole section on
like things we deal with losing a loved
one is part of that and grieving and
grief that is all part of that but had I
been doing my staff yes I was still
grieved yes order still felt sad but
didn't mean disaster but it wasn't I
never took my own
at all last year I did what I wanted to
do and didn't listen to anyone round me
and it it was not like I said it was a
really bad time but what to manage BPD
the only thing the only thing medication
doesn't help with managing BPD the only
thing that helps is rewiring our brain
and the way we rewire our brain is
through learning skills such as DBT
whether you never take medication or
you're on medication
it doesn't matter is it no medication
self's BPD it is very much what you put
into your recovery what the like how
much ever you put into learning their
skills practicing them when you don't
need them I say this all the time I try
to drum it into everyone like it's what
you do go along to your two-hour session
once a week but if you don't then
practice it at home or do your homework
or learn you're probably not going to
recover as quick as you could you might
not at all it's how much effort you want
to put in and it seems like a real like
oh my god I've got that does this and
I've got to do this but you only do it
for a short time because once you've got
it you've got it and then it just comes
naturally unless you have a huge life
event happen it was the beginning the
last year I had the big breakup from my
younger twos dad so I was going through
that I got sick I wasn't very well for a
few months I lost my uncle and it was
just one thing after another and
immediately I just started acting how I
would have a long time ago and not how I
should if I'd carried on doing what I
was supposed to be doing
so can you recover from BPD with no
medication of course but don't think of
medication as a bad thing think of it as
it's something that can just help you
for the time being you don't have to be
on it forever just give you that boost
to learn those skills once you have
those skills you'll be able to manage
your BPD it doesn't mean you won't have
horrid huge lifetime events it doesn't
mean you won't get anxious from time to
time it doesn't mean you won't feel down
and depressed from time to time but
hopefully if you're putting those skills
into place you will be able to manage
those other symptoms so much so much
better than if you didn't if you didn't
know if you didn't have those skills so
yeah i'ma leave it there it's 12 minutes
and I thought I'd do it in five I love
you all loads and I'll be back in the
week