Believe it or not BPD has some positives! The deep love we feel is one of them. I did not want to lose those feel-good feelings when I came in to recovery.
hi guys today I'm going to do a request from someone called weakling I must stop there I have no idea weakling why you were called yourself this and I might be completely wrong but if you have because you suffer with borderline or you suffer with your mental health I am here to tell you you are certainly not weak you're strong strong strong people with BPD people mental health we are strong we are fighters we are worried is and we have to be people that don't have mental health problems if they were to spend a day in our shoes I do not think they would last like we lost so yeah I felt I should say that but I might be completely wrong it might be your surname who knows so anyway right the request was do love and connections feel weaker during recovery as you're trying to move away from codependent connections and have healthy ones and to do the healthier connections then not feel as strong and I think that's a great question because I had that fear I was like I hated all the negative parts that borderline bought into my life but believe it or not there are some positives to have a borderline and the strong connections the deep deep love that we feel is one of the positive ones so the last thing we want is to come in to say recovery and not have that passion that I just love this person and I'm here to tell you that it doesn't go away low the good thing with recovery is we can learn to manage our emotions but why would we try and lessen our good emotions we wouldn't so that's not something we really focus on yes we try to pull away from the codependent relationships and I used to think that co-dependent relationships were great how we both need each other and we're so in love and it's only now that I'm in recovery that I look back and think oh my god that was so unhealthy and but I get the fear behind it and like I was saying we come into recovery and we manage all those intense negative emotions something that's going to guess into trouble when we're so sad we want to self-harm always so angry you want to fight someone and we learn to kind of control that but I love love love love my children my love my children is so intense and it's just as intense now as it always has been my love for my partner I love love love love my partner when I got with my partner it was my BP he was pretty out of control and I loved loved loved him one minute and he was the best for ages and ages and then one day he came crashing down and I decided I didn't like him and all that black and white thinking the splitting I did all that now I get love love love love love it doesn't come crashing down I manage my BPD so I don't have big screaming matches I don't go smashing things up or hurting myself for acting impulsively but I've still got those intense feelings like really fancy him and I still get now and I think that's one of the positive or VPD is that we do get these intense emotions and the good ones are fantastic and no it doesn't go away again in the beginning I think myself and my partner without me even realizing we had quite a codependent relationship we literally did everything together and and he moved out and it was such a wrench me because I was like oh my god I felt like I was half the person like because I felt together we were a whole and but like I said I came I was recovering and learning to manage the BPD and I got some independence and now we very much have a separate lives and rather than thinking half and half we make a hole I CSS I'm one person he's one person together way too in that so much better and yes I still get the intense feelings he can ever take me at times but isn't that normal I got keep my voice down um but yeah and like I said with my kids that intense intense love and so no i do not think the love and the connections feel weaker possibly when you first say come out of a codependent relationship and your first coming into recovery and you're learning your skills for sure maybe they do to start with because you're so used to this codependent relationship that all of a sudden you're on your own and like i said i kinda just felt like i was half the person but you've got give it time and you're not just going to feel fantastic straight away and have all those great feelings because of recovery unfortunately isn't a walk in the park we have to put effort into it and while we're doing that and we're focusing on our relationship some of the relationships can seem like perhaps they are weaker because all our energy is or should be focused on our recovery but once we have that under our belt and we have those skills in place and we learning to manage it that's when we rebuild our relationship we rebuild the fractured relationships that kind of destroyed when we're in the madness I suppose but um yeah it is just giving it give it some time and no the good feelings don't they don't just go and there in fact so much better because now whereas before say this was my baseline and I was up here hi downhill Oh up here hide down here low now I'm just like I'm a b-side and I get high every now and again my intense feelings but I don't get this drop and it's so much better I suppose as well from doing that run a baseline to say we've had a high then we come right down low when we cannot high again it possibly feels so much higher because we've come down from rock bottom to feeling like SAT alone clip of the world but it's not like I would rather go from here to here then down here to here so yes that feels like you're getting higher and higher and higher and higher okay as opposed to this but you're still getting just as high but you just haven't got there mmm bet if that makes sense so I'm going to leave that there guys I'm going to try and do not video babe uses steal you um yeah we get on with another video hope you all well love your loads okay
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