Today I discuss the meds Ive been on – the ones that have worked and the ones that haven’t.

hi guys happy day today I'm filming on
my phone in a snug ISA and had his first
day at school yesterday which went
really well but he's off school today
and then he goes back in tomorrow so he
was in the other room and he's playing
and making loads of noise so I thought I
would just come in here and film in here
rather than doing it in there and I'm
going to discuss medication today
because I had a few questions in my last
video where I talked about the
grapefruit so basically I've been on so
many different medications over the
years and I probably won't remember them
all when I was 21 and I got out a mental
health ward I was on nearly 30 tablets a
day so what I've done I've written them
up on my flip chart and I will tell you
a bit about them like there's certain
things that I don't remember because it
was just some really bad time in my life
but I will start with the medication I'm
on now this is an old box dated the 22nd
of June 17th but it's what I'm more now
which is quetiapine XL and it says 50
milligrams on here it says take 2 and 2
were needed but I kept having it hopped
so they're not go to 450 now I just need
to take one cuz I've got 200 milligram
tablet XL means slow release so CRO
type-ins really really sedating I'm on
200 milligrams which is very sedating
but the slow release one seems to be
less sedating now the reason I went
initially on Excel was I just couldn't
wake up to the baby when she was first
born when I wasn't on the slowly so they
put me on slow release and I'm fortunate
enough that I've been able to stay on
that because I don't think I could
function daily with four kids and
everything that I need to do
if I wasn't on the slow-release if I had
that big hitter there all-in-one I just
think it completely Zonk me now I take
my 200 milligram tablet at nighttime and
then I'll go straight to it if I stay
here and then stayed up toward some tell
you of that I would literally be raiding
cupboards for chocolate crisps
I'd eat so much so that's why I
literally I take it and had go straight
to bed
to avoid that like wanting to read in
the fridge and eat absolutely everything
and the other medication I'm on is
certainly and it says 100 milligrams I'm
on 200 so 2 tablets the day I take them
in the evening as well with micro typing
now settlings an antidepressant cat eye
pins and antipsychotic these are the
like this is the best combination of
medicine I've ever been on it really
really works for me
the sertraline really picks up my mood I
think I'm on maximum dose of settling
which is 200 the quetiapine for me
really helps with intrusive thoughts so
I can go through stages where my
thoughts become so overwhelming but I
just don't know what to do with myself
and they start really interfering with
like day-to-day life and the core type
in stops that basically so I can have a
clear head and and then the only other
medication Armani's the pill birth
control which really isn't relevant to
this video or maybe is if here we go and
but I will stick with the mental health
medication so
that's what I'm on at the moment and
over the years I have been on such a big
variety other antipsychotics that I have
been on I was on lands appeal also known
outside practice' and I have never eaten
so much in my life as when I was on that
I started E and here's the thing I
suffered with bulimia for so many years
so being on that and then eating
everything and made me want to binge
more so it would like I was not on it
very long before it was decided no this
isn't the best medication for me and I
came off it the I was then put on our
appraisal which is a bill also known as
a vilify another anti-psychotic when
they put me on this I think it was like
the end of an August or getting a
September and I started getting like
suicidal really my mood I was getting
worse and I kept going back and saying
I'm getting worse and they would
increase the medication and I'd go back
again like I'm getting so much worse and
it got to a point that I was actually
suicidal I didn't wanna go on I felt
like no one was listening to me I was
saying that I'm getting worse and they
kept happening and in the end off side
don't you think it's medicator I don't
know if I actually said that but I think
it might have been my mom that pointed
out to them but anyway they took me off
that and they put me on quetiapine and
the change was amazing like I stopped
feeling suicidal my mood completely
lifted the intrusive thoughts stopped so
that was definitely then proof that the
era pip resolve did not agree with me
now I must point out here very quickly
thou I'm talking about these medications
and some were bad for me some work well
for me but that doesn't mean those ones
bad for you or the ones that good for me
will be good for you because we are all
different and I've really learned over
the years that it is trial and error it
sucks it's horrible especially when
you're trying and you just can't seem to
find something but it is sticking with
her for years I was on so many different
medications and I never ever thought
they worked but I was using cocaine
daily I was drinking alcohol daily I
what the bulimia was out of control
so I had all these other things going on
so there was no way that I was even
allowing these medications to work
because I wasn't supposed to be drinking
on them I wasn't supposed to be using
drugs on them but I was and so do look
at like all other factors in your life
if you're thinking this medication isn't
working I think why like it might be
because you are drinking daily because
you are using drugs or whatever other
reason one of the drugs that I was put
on when I left the mental health ward
was the spiral also known as busbar and
that was for generalized anxiety
disorder and I felt that really worked
well for me at the time I can't remember
any negatives to the spiral and because
I was on perspire on I was on utter acts
also known as visceral or hydroxyzine
again that was for anxiety and I found
at relax worked really well for me as
well the atarax
the the spiral is a clone was another
and citalopram they were all ones that I
was on all at the same time so I was
like quite a concoction of medication so
yeah I don't remember anything bad about
the spiral don't remember anything bad
about a tract citalopram was the
antidepressant and that worked really
really well for me the reason I stopped
you I think was I got pregnant and so
they changed it to search for lean
because I think they just have more
information about set
lean and lighting with regards to
pregnancy so I changed on to that and I
haven't looked back because sertraline
like I said I've only had positives from
that so yes atella Pam seemed to work
well to be fair that all these I think
they worked well it was when I was using
and I was drinking a lot say there were
times that I just felt like my mood was
on the floor where it was possibly more
to do with all the alcohol that I was
drinking all the drugs I was taking as
opposed to needing my medication opted
which I used to always say to my doctor
I need my medication optix not what I
need it up to I need a heart but I
wasn't truly honest and wouldn't mention
the drugs to them or I would say I drank
less than I did at this point and
zopiclone I would take at night how
asleep I never knew that it's addictive
because I've never had a problem believe
it or not being an X cocaine addict I've
never had an addiction to prescribe
medication I know lots of people that do
but I never knew zopiclone was and I
never had a problem I take it sometimes
or just take like at night and I would
go to sleep immediately because I find
if you don't go to sleep and shut your
eyes immediately then it can wear off
and then you can't sleep I kind of
abused it in a way in the fact that oh
sometimes skip a night if I wasn't using
so I could save that tablet so when I
was on coke and I needed to sleep I
could take double which I would not
recommend to anyone so yeah that was the
zopiclone the
the other one that I was on ah Ciroc
that I was on it's also known as paxil
her paroxetine Ciroc suck ya little sock
sack caused me to be like suicidal I
attempted suicide pronounced on-air I
literally I was so bad it had such a bad
effect and when I was in the hospital
they said maybe it's the medication
there's been some controversy around it
and apparently it caused other people to
become suicidal as well and the other
medication of diazepam valium again
highly addictive people addicted to
benzos I never got addicted to it I
could take it or leave it
so my doctor wouldn't mind prescribing
because sometimes I'll just go weeks
without taking it and I didn't get how
people would but I was in when I didn't
mean have I learned that some people
like uppers like the cocaine crack
cocaine sand opera or some people like
downers alcohol heroin etc and those
Downers did nothing for me I was an
upper sore person so maybe that's why
but then I likes the alcohol but I liked
the alcohol because I would take so much
cocaine I'd be so up I'd need something
to bring me down but again horrid
combination don't recommend it and I
think that's all the ones I've written
down but yeah like I said my arms I've
got pins and needles in my hand from
holding the phone and yeah like I said
just because something didn't work for
me it doesn't mean it wouldn't work for
you but with like I said the ones that
I'm on at the moment croteau pain and
certainly they have been the best
combination of all the medications I've
had but I don't drink
: I don't use drugs now so I am actually
allowing the medication to work which is
something and saying yeah they say the
quetiapine can be even now it can be
sedative and like I said the downer on
it is that it can make me but that's why
I literally take it and go straight to
sleep so so therefore I don't have that
damn apparently certainly and can make
you anxious I've got a thing like my
knees always going oh like I'm always
moving either moving my foot or tacking
my fur I'm sitting down and someone said
that could be the sertraline that does
that but I think I was like that anyway
I think I just like moving about the
next week or so is gonna be a bit
difficult I'm going to try and still get
my usual videos out I've got to get
Trey's video out um I'm hoping Friday
betrays video I'm a little boy like I
said he started school but tomorrow and
the next day he goes in just for half
days and next week he just goes in for a
half day before he starts full-time
school so I don't have as much time as I
would when he actually goes and starts
for normally but I've got the book back
my book the big book on borderline
personality disorder and I'm just
literally I've got to reread it check
everything's okay and then it can go to
print the designer goes away in a week
and a half so if I want my back out in
October I have a week to get it done and
but there was like 450 pages I've got a
three I'm on about paid 50 so I've
literally got a lot on and I want this
book out in October because I've said
you guys it's gonna be out in October
and I'm gonna make sure it's out in
October but yeah considering my little
boys not in school full-time yet uh
lottie's not even the nursery because
she's unwell again and really windy so
but she's asleep at the moment
thankfully so I can do this video but um
yeah the next week if I miss a day don't
be angry because I will be back and I
haven't forgotten you guys and I'm just
so looking forward to getting back into
a routine with everything but it just
feels like the last few weeks have
literally just been completely manic so
um I'm gonna leave that there today guys
and then yeah
hopefully I'll trace video be out on
Friday I'm looking forward to you seeing
him and checking out his channel because
he's amazing right
I love you all loads
This transcript was auto-generated and therefore may contain mistakes.

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