hi guys today I'm doing a video request
and asking what causes BPD and and not
just biological side now the answer
basically is no one knows for sure what
causes it
there have been loads of studies done
and loads and loads of different
theories all backed up by evidence one
obviously is the biological side meaning
it's been passed down genetically but
just say there is a child whose mum has
borderline personality disorder and that
child grows up and has borderline
personality disorder it'd be very easy
to think well it must have been passed
on genetically and that's why but the
other theory is it's not been passed on
genetically but this child has grown up
watching and learning their mum's
behaviors coping skills how they
interact in relationships and they grow
up with these beliefs that this is
normal because it is normal to them it's
what they've learned so there is that
theory little off personality they think
can have a huge part in it some people
are more naturally just more emotional
than others I think like from the
research I've done I haven't done loads
and loads of research and from what I
have done a lot most people with BPD not
all but most have had some kinda trauma
in early childhood childhood or their
teenagers now it can be different for
everyone and it could be losing a parent
it could be neglect it could be sexual
abuse physical abuse
and because I suppose as a child we're
kind of growing and we're learning about
the world around us and we are forming
beliefs core beliefs about things and
just say there is a child and they are
being physically abused at home by their
parents they grow up with certain
beliefs about how relationships are and
how people treat each other and not just
their beliefs but they can they will
then gare from a young age coping
strategies often unhelpful ones to help
them cope and because we're not
naturally like we're not born and
brought up learning about mindfulness
and distressed horror ins we don't have
this we will just do whatever we can to
get through life as easily as possible I
suppose especially when we've got lots
of traumatic events going on around us
so just say a teenager again
the teenager they're still forming
beliefs still I suppose their
personality is still developing and to
say like for example me as a teenager I
really believe and I needed ways to cope
because I had all this built-up anger
fear I was very sad felt very alone and
and I started drinking alcohol and it
took some of those feelings away so that
then became one of my coping mechanisms
and I started self-harming and that
became one of my coping mechanisms
so I would say
it's kind of a combination it's not one
thing for people that say didn't
necessarily have a really dramatic event
they won't be used or anything but they
still have borderline well how how do
they have it up just because they
weren't abused it that's not to say that
the behaviors not learnt from someone
around them about relationships and how
we deal with other people and there
might be a boy growing up in a household
that seems normal but if he cries his
dad tells him to man up and so he's not
allowed to express those emotions
healthily so over the years they build
and build and build become more and more
painful and he might hit his teenage
years and turn to drink or drugs I'm not
saying that is um case and but for sure
it could be one of the reasons and so I
think that's all I can think of rock on
blank what is going on with my mind
people what is going on with my mind
I'll just keep going blank and going
often like I'm away with fairies and but
I hope that answers your question I mean
if you've got borderline and you're
questioning why why do I have it have a
look at your beliefs and think like
where do these beliefs come from maybe
you believe that all men tree well where
does that belief come from maybe your
dad had an affair when you were younger
and so you grew up thinking well that's
normal or your parents divorce or maybe
you think we're all relation
it's break up anyway and but I
definitely say kind of have a look at
your beliefs and where they come from
think back work was there any traumatic
events this could stem from where from a
young age you started having to learn
certain coping mechanisms obviously not
going to be probably drinking drugs when
you're six and seven years old but maybe
you coped in different ways um I don't
think I really particularly had a really
traumatic
I wasn't basically sexually abused or
physically abused as a child but I know
that I would often just go away into my
own little world and I would play with
my Cindy dolls for hours and hours and
hours just be all on my own and it was
the way I would just completely cut off
I actually got to like 11 or 12 and I
remember thinking I just don't want to
play with my dolls but thinking you're
too old you're too off but it was really
hard to let go that because that was my
little world away from everything and I
can remember the day and where I was and
pecking them all up into a box thinking
you're too old to play with your dog was
now and but I didn't understand that
actually maybe that was my way of just
dealing with my emotions and it was like
a getaway for me ah so was what started
out it wasn't just like um cuz we'll get
little girls play with their dolls I'm
not and I would be there literally it
was just constant and I wouldn't play
with anyone else with my dolls if I had
friends around I wouldn't be like her
play with my dolls it was something that
I just went doing my own and now looking
back it was definitely my escapism
um but I hit my teenage years and then
alcohol became escapism then drugs
became escapism
and so my coping method methods changed
it have been a lot less harmful I
suppose if I'd kept my dolls how but
that would have been weird yeah I'm sure
I can hear baby squeaking on the monitor
again she's tasting and so yeah I will
leave that there
I hope it answered your question I might
try and get another quick video done now
and maybe upload it tomorrow say bye
guys