hi my lovelies welcome back to my
channel if you are new here I do videos
on addiction eating disorders but mainly
on borderline personality disorder and
mental health such as anxiety or
depression if you are new don't forget
to hit the subscribe button and the
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wouldn't have new videos out it is so
hot today and I love it love it love it
love it
although I used to like smother myself
and oil and literally just lie in the
Sun to go dark but now I wear factor 50
because I realize is damaging to the
skin am I supposed said today I'm doing
a video request from Lucy hi Lucy and
Lucy asked me to discuss when like when
DBT finishes or therapy finishes or we
get discharged for our mental health
team I remember when I like there's
charge from our mental health team I was
begging them I saying you can't like I
speaking them not to discharge me saying
you can't discharge me what am I gonna
do what if something goes wrong and
they're like we've given you all the
tools you have everything you need
you've been doing well for really like a
long time we we there's no no more
services we can offer you so we can
discharge you but I remember the fear
that like completely took over me
because I was like I'm going to relapse
oh do you know what I started thinking
this is really bad but I started
thinking I feel like going home and self
harming and saying see I'm not I'm fine
I'm not okay but actually I wasn't at
stage we're all in it to self-harm or do
that but I also I like wanted to create
some crisis so they kept hold with me
and did not let me go because I was
terrified I felt I'd be all on my own I
would
have no support especially like over
here I know that is very difficult to
get into the mental health system and
once you're out with it it's very
difficult to get back into it there is a
long way and that absolutely scared the
life out of me
now I am still under a mental health
team now the reason for that I was very
fortunate but when I got pregnant with
Lottie things started going like my
mental health really went downhill near
the end and just to be on the safe side
I luckily got back into the system and
they were there if I needed them and I
still now have like just an appointment
every three months with my psychiatrist
and he's amazing bar I also know that
when the come time comes for them to
discharge me I will be okay we create a
lot of the fear in our own minds fear
there all of sudden we've got no one but
usually they should only be discharging
you if you have been given the tools
that you need now here's the thing that
I always say to you they say there's no
cure for BPD I get that but it is
manageable and is manageable to the
point that if I went to the doctor now
I wouldn't get discharged because I
wouldn't get discharged I wouldn't get
diagnosed because I don't meet the
criteria because I manage it on a
day-to-day basis so many of us and
myself included in the beginning we like
go to our doctor like help me and we
think it's the doctor that will make as
well but actually it's not with BPD we
need to put in that work ourselves
we need to put is a sitz we're the ones
that have the power to make ourselves
well the medical professionals can guide
us but they're not the ones that can
make us better we have to do that even
if we're doing DBT and we're going to
group at the end of the day if we don't
put in the work at home we're not going
to get well we weird the ones they can
show us they can guide us but that is
all they can do they can't make us
practice our skills they can't you know
like that is down to us and I think a
big part so we get to a stage where
they're gonna discharge us is recognize
actually we've done a lot this this is
what we've done we've got ourselves here
now that is not like undermining any of
the medical professionals because yes we
need them for for medical reasons for
example like when they're prescribing
medication they're the ones that can do
that they're the ones that can and put
us forward to go on a DBT course or some
kind of therapy and we need them for
that we need it's good for the
counseling side being able to talk about
it but once you get to the point of
discharge you should have enough skills
in place that you will be okay I know
it's scary what we don't like change
anyway and we can kind of feel like
they're just getting rid of us but it's
not if that's not the case it means
actually we've got to a stage we should
be really proud of ourselves like yeah
I've got this far I do agree that there
should be something in place for those
of us with BPD after so once we've been
discharged once we've got all the skills
then what because we do tend to feel
really alone and that is what BPD tribe
my website is all about guys I have been
working on this for a while I've kind of
been stuck for the past couple of months
and then I have my uncle pass away and
actually it's probably just excuses I
really feel like really
stuck at the minute but like I was
talking to my partner yesterday my part
business partner guys I'm not seeing
anyone
yesterday and we're like we're gonna
really go for it at the end of July so
I'm really hoping by August it's gonna
be up because I think this will be like
another step what it can be used for
people that are still under a rental
health team but it's also a fantastic
place for those that are getting
discharged to know they still got that
community and they've got that support
there I will do a video again on it in a
bit more detail because yeah I'll just
do that quite soon but please know it's
like it's you that makes yourself well
if you find you get to a point crisis
point there are people you can phone
there a hotline gene phone there are the
Samaritans crisis teams go back to your
doctor it doesn't mean you're completely
on your own although it can feel like
that and I just want you to know like
when you get to this point ring
discharge I know it's scary but it's the
next chapter for you it means you're
doing what you're supposed to be doing
you're getting where you need to be
going you're you're okay right I'm not
saying everything's perfect and I'm not
saying it's not scary but you are strong
enough and they wouldn't discharge you
if they didn't think you were ready
regarding like if you were doing a DVT
group and then it's stopping well that
doesn't mean it has to stop at home all
those lessons that you had any kind of
paperwork read up on it set yourself
time every day to go over that because
actually like I said it with DBT it's
what you do it's how much you practice
it it doesn't matter if you're just sat
there in a group I mean it I know you
feel like oh yeah we're all together but
actually DBT is what you do at home it's
the skills that you put into practice
that will make you well so I would say
like get yourself a little diary get
yourself a little bit busy maybe you
want to do some volunteer work maybe you
want to put a site well you should
definitely put aside time to be
practicing your skills and just know you
will be okay why I'm absolutely sweating
keep looking around my cat keeps licking
I got the black bag that is going to the
charity shop for this stuff and cat is
just like okay so I'm going to go I
apologize this video is out Saturday
yesterday yesterday just went by and I
didn't get the video done I don't even
really know what I did I didn't really
do anything productive Hey I say I love
you all load and I'll be back nicely