Today I have been in a mad rush as I decided to decorate the house as a surprise for the kids when they got home! Therefore I’m filming whilst decorating the Christmas Tree! I have spent the past week having a major declutter and had a problem when I struggled to give away a teddy – in case I hurt it’s feelings!

hi guys today's video is a bit different
because I've got tech the kids in an
hour and a half I want to decorate for
Christmas as a surprise for them so I
need to get that done and you know like
tinsel gets everywhere and so I just
need to whoo vacuum everywhere I also
need to get dinner done before I collect
them so it's ready because I put one of
the mums coming over she's going out for
works do and I'm doing her makeup for
her so it's like a bit manic so I'm
gonna decorate my tree while I do my
video my Harry Potter I like that it is
pretty so if this week I have I've had a
massive like declutter and so today I'm
gonna kinda talk about that because it's
really cleansing it makes you feel
really good but I really became aware of
something and I don't know if it's my I
don't know if it's the borderline
personality disorder but I seem to put
like sentimental value on everything not
just that okay let give you an idea of
who I mean
so okay first of all the sentimental
value like all my kids birthday cards
all their Christmas cards I have kept
over the years I have four children
that's a lot of cards like I had just
piles and piles of cards and I was like
are they ever going to like look back
and want to look at their old cards
because I don't think they are and
they're taking up room in my cupboard
and you know what guys I've got to the
point that I just feel like I've got so
much stuff like there's just stuff
everywhere and
not even like stuff of value it's not
stuff I use it's just stuff I put a
sentimental value on and then I don't
want to throw it out so I was like okay
I've got to be like really ruthless and
so I went through all their birthday
cards like I kept the ones that like
congratulations you've just had a baby
girl or boy I kept stuff like that
but all the ones for ages like two three
four five they have gone and I feel so
much better for it just put it all in
the recycling so oh I hope none of you
have OCD who are watching me do this
because don't be a bit of a mishmash
right oh that's okay yeah so okay so I
went into the boys room I did the boys
room first because I'm really where
Christmas is coming they end up getting
like so much stuff and like I said I'm
at the point of like oh my god like
every cupboard is full every it's just
driving me nuts so I was like oh my god
Chris miss is coming they're gonna have
more stuff now they get stuff like that
they don't even use that are from two
Christmases ago games that are still in
the wrapper that haven't even been
opened and played with so I was just
like not doing it
gonna have a real clear out declutter
everywhere so I started on my cupboard
down here clearing through staff went up
to the boys room gave loads of stuff to
charity my daughter collects I don't
know if they have them we wherever you
are but T Y toys they're little cute
Teddy's oh hang on I mean this one's
been drawn on but you know these but you
can get the little ones
my daughter collected them for years
never played with them just
the mantra her pets and they are all
like new I gave them all to the nursery
because um like my daughter goes to
nursery so I know she'll have loads of
Lottie will get to play with it there
and it will get so much useful the other
kids so it was really like a nice
feeling that these toys that actually
been played with as opposed to being
stored under my daughter's bed so I was
cleaning the boys room and what's
happened there does that working still I
think so so I couldn't leave the boys
room out and then there was like they
have soft toys teddies they don't play
with again and I was like I'm getting
rid I'm getting rid I'm getting rid and
I came across a little what is happening
here I came across this little teddy
like it was only like this big and old
and battered and I never bought it I'll
tell you the story behind it when I
lived in my old flat when I like came
downstairs in the hallway like the
communal hallway I found this old
battered teddy on the floor and I
thought okay I'm gonna put it up here on
the side where everyone's post like may
okay so whoever owns it can reclaim it
and it was there one week and it was
there two weeks and three weeks
no one came and got this little teddy so
this is what I mean I don't know if this
is the BPD but I started feeling really
bad for the teddy like it like I was
like that poor little thing no one wants
it like it have feelings and um one day
I was just like I couldn't bear it I was
like this poor teddy it's got no home
it's just left out there in the cold it
must be freezing and I adopted it so I
took the teddy in and I gave it a home
under one of the kids beds and I found
it so when I'm clearing out all their
toys getting rid of stuff I found it and
I was at all what should I do if I I'm
tall like how can I give you away I'm
your adoptive mom and I just fell I just
felt so bad but in the end I was like I
had to tell myself this is just a teddy
like it's a toy it's not real it is
doesn't have feelings you're giving away
all the other Teddy's so why would you
give this away and then I started
thinking oh my goodness the other
Teddy's are gonna feel bad if I'm giving
them away and I'm keeping one so I've
had a real dilemma guys I gave the teddy
to away to the charity show up I thought
is that VPD thing like are we just so
sensitive like super super super
sensitive that we then get in our head
toys have feelings so I got rid of the
teddy anyway bad me what does this tree
look like okay I'm getting there and um
yes I was gonna like ask you guys have
you ever had that with a toy or a doll
or anything an inanimate object have you
felt like you could feel its feelings
like could you or is it just me is it
just me that things like that because
honestly I felt really really bad it's
just like really bad Oprah
god damn Teddy so
so carried on clearing out everything I
did a run to the charity shop today
because at least then I know they're
making money for charity I mean this and
really nice stuff there so maybe a mum
that can't afford to buy like a certain
thing and they see it in the shop and
they can get it really cheap and then
they're happy the child's happy the
charity shops happy I'm happy because
I've cleared stuff out and so yeah like
I think there's something really
refreshing about clearing out all old
stuff and after I'd got rid of the Teddy
I felt really like empowered like I mean
I felt a bit bad like I said but I also
felt like yeah you know what it's people
that matter and like life experiences
not the stuff that we have and we
accumulate and we store away so I would
suggest it's a red light to you it's
really cleansing go through all your
stuff and stuff like that you've had for
years but you wouldn't even notice if it
was gone like you don't look there you
don't why do we keep it player out get
rid honestly it's so empowering like is
just I feel like my head is clear
because around me isn't a mess I mean
right now it's nicer if I have one of
the decorations everywhere I always like
to stick with red and gold really
traditional and I always have coloured
lights I don't know why I think it
reminds me of Christmases when I was a
child and I used to like have amazing
Christmases because my grandma or my
grandpa he's passed away now but he used
to like his house he'd make it look like
Santa's grotto
and that it was so exciting the only
thing we weren't allowed to open any
presence till after the Queen's speech
and that's I think like three o'clock
and as a child that's really hard seeing
all the toys but I mean my cousins would
be there and we always had a lovely day
and so I suppose now I kind of want to
replicate that for my kids so they have
really happy memories of Christmas I
mean I'm really fortunate my 19 year old
still believes in Santa she's starting
to doubt it and a little bit like she
asked me but it's like what do you
really think I would spend all that
money buy a new rubbish and putting it
in a stop Kim and she's like yeah that's
true you wouldn't do that
so she still believes which is nice how
is this tree looking I'm missing this
area I'm tired but save me I don't know
funny this is the first year I've got
the cats and I'm like what if they start
trying to climb a tree
they've already they were so excited the
cats when I bought um they were so
excited when I started bringing
everything here like they thought it was
a little party going on jumping over
everything there
so Christmas will be here soon I know
it's a difficult time for a lot of
people like I said like I've got bad
memories but I'm quite good at blocking
memories L so like my bad memories came
later on like Edward as a child
Christmas was a really magical time so
yeah I kind of I get real excited about
it I go on our what's it called uh
where's my PNP pump which is portable
North Pole and it's a website and you
can make videos for your child
and there's some free ones you can do or
you can pay like well it's ten pound I
think for the year so I do that because
it's really worth it because then I can
make any videos as I want so you have
the actual center and the actual elves
and real reindeer all in this video and
you put your child's details in so like
you put their name and then the elves go
to the big library and they find a book
and it's got your child's name on it and
then you find out they're on the naughty
list and as a parent you can choose
where they are read obviously as naughty
careens good or amber Santa's not sure
and so last year by you for my
daughter's elicit mentality yeah um
really like playing the art causing me
and uh I made a video have made it amber
I wasn't mean enough to make it read but
you know what she soon but her ideas up
when she who she was on shoes oh my
goodness I thought oh no Amelia you've
only got a month to turn it around can
you do it
she was a little angel for the month so
that worked treat and weapon is the
little ones up here yeah I really hope
the cats aren't going to die believe
so yes we have Christmas coming up
Christmas is difficult I'm going to try
and check in with you guys more by doing
what's happened more regular videos I
might do some live streams once a week
to see how you guys getting on and we
also then have the end of the year and
that's what I kinda mean like it
wherever there's immense there's a new
beginning so if you feel like you've had
a really bad year this year next year is
a new year you can have a new start and
maybe next year will be different so I'm
like for me having the good good to
clear out declutter everything it's like
really refreshing I can go into the new
year without my house full of rubbish
and I think I think for me it's been
like really nice because I've finally
realized that Teddy's don't happy ings
that similar to that color it's nearly 2
o'clock so what I'm going to do I'm
thinking do I bring this in I might do
the cooking with you another time
because you don't know this but you are
on a camera that is balanced on about 40
DVDs and it's wobbling slightly cuz I
didn't want to put the camera down there
because then you'd be looking at me like
really unflattering so I have to put you
up hi guys
I'm sure I've just decorated this side
that's okay because when people come in
this is the side this see I'm not
decorating the back of it because we
don't see it I'm sure something you'll
be going but I can't see it out of sight
out of mind
Bowl gonna go so yeah well today's video
I suppose was about one decluttering
like clearing because honestly if you
clear your surroundings you feel better
I mean there's the finish way where they
say a few certain things in certain
places you feel good and I definitely
think there's something in that and I
definitely feel so much like lighter now
that half my rubbish has gone and I
don't feel like I've got my Christmas
decorations just masking all the mess
underneath I've cleared it out first and
yeah I kind of wanted to ask you do you
think that's the BPD thing do you do you
do you where can you go oh you've got
dents in you or don't I'm gonna leave it
guys thank you for decorating my
decorating my tree with me or keeping me
company while I did that I'll have to do
the rest later call get on with the food
Oh ever so tricky I had such a laugh
yesterday so I've cleared out my cabinet
I would move the camera bomb scared if I
touch it it's just gonna all collapse so
I cleared it out it's like got windows
so you can see through my daughter had
made me this little fairy and she
painted it and so she put it right up
it's I have it tucked in the corner at
the back and she bought him right up his
face is looking out look at it
o Allah she was like are you laughing at
my face I'm like no I love it
hello it is really really good I love it
but she's shy so she has to go at the
back side she like you think she's
horrible as I know I love her but she's
a shy fairy so let's do it
don't go back in Makaha right at the
back and just for a few things in front
of her I have such a nice mum but okay
I'm gonna leave that because I do have
to go and get tea neuron and do you know
what I will do cooking with you one day
why not why not say keep yourself safe I
know Christmas is round corner lots of
people going out work dudes that said
truck you so safe I will check in with
you more regularly yeah and I'll be back
next week anyway guys what day is it
I might try and do a livestream tomorrow
I will let you know in the day how I'm
going yeah I love you all
This transcript was auto-generated and therefore may contain mistakes.

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