Today I discuss the first step of the 10 steps that I have developed to combat this disorder. Admitting we have a problem sounds easier than it actually is. To admit we have a problem means we stop blaming other people and past events and finally accept that the problem lies within us.
hi i'm lovelyz happy Wednesday I need to make an apology in advance the children are still off school and they don't get back to the first week of September so I can't promise I'll have all three videos out next week I'm trying I really want to do them but it's very difficult when the kids are so yeah I just wanted to apologize in advance if I don't get them out but like I said first week September they back at school back from routine everything be good and secondly I have a few collaborations coming up actually the first one is with Cory whose channel is the borderline life and that should be out next week so I'm very excited about that I hope you all enjoy it and thirdly in my last video I mentioned to you that I have developed 10 steps that I believe we can take to recover from BPD now I think these steps could actually work for anyone like with any mental health issue but I focus on borderline so we will stick with borderline recovery now today I'm going to talk to you about step 1 I when I develop these steps I had inspiration from the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous and I saw how they can work but I wanted to adapt them and make them so they fit borderline personality disorder so they're not exactly the same but they're similar in the fact that just like the triceps are AAA they're not just steps you take and put down and forget about you do them they become a way of life a spiritual way of life and that's very much with the 10 steps I've come up with all of them like them to be a way of life for you and I believe if you do follow them and you do them you can recover so today like I said I'm going to talk about step one and step one is very similar to the first step of a collapse Anonymous which is admit we're powerless over alcohol and our lives have become unmanageable this step step one is basically we admit that the problem lies within us we admit there is a problem and when I say it lies within us I say that for a reason because when I got diagnosed with BPD yeah I would say I've got BPD but deep down I still didn't think I was the problem I was too busy blaming boyfriends or ex partners or ex events like in boletus school and I really accept that hang on okay these external events certainly might have contributed to em but at the end of the day the problem is with me I am the problem it's my behaviors the way I'm thinking and feeling and I'm not saying that the way we feel is wrong because our feelings are perfectly valid but they can be so intense that they can cause us to have distorted thinking and we can behave in a way that's not very nice and we really need to in this first step admit I'm the problem I need to do something I need to take responsibility and this is so important because if we don't do this we're not gonna recover now often step one will come when we have literally hit rock bottom and we feel nothing is ever going to change our life we literally cannot get any worse and when we hit rock bottom we have a choice either to give up and stay there or ok I'm gonna do something I'm gonna take action and it's often when we hit rock bottom that we finally we can see clearly for the first time we are we realize blaming other people doesn't work holding on to past events doesn't work it's not gonna make us feel any better we're now absolutely at rock-bottom and we kind of like we see clear anything okay the problems within me once we admit that the problem is within us we can then take action to change that and take our lives back and recover from this disorder now when we admit the problem is within us we are not blaming ourselves we didn't choose to have this disorder but what we're doing is taking responsibility and we have to do that we have to admit that the problem lies within us we have to because otherwise recovery is not possible because we're gonna carry on spending the rest of the time blaming other people blaming life's events asking why why me when actually step one we just have to say okay I have a problem this is causing real problems in my life I admit the problem is within me and I'm going to do something about it so when you admit the problem lies with an asset right when I admitted it I didn't have to go and tell people you just admit it to yourself this is an internal thing where you sit down and you recognize no it's not everyone else around me causing the problems that's not all the drama then the one who's causing the drum I'm the one causing the drama now it's not nice to think like that but that's the fact that's a fact that's what it is that's what borderline personality is I always had drama like always problems with my relationships and no it wasn't always my fault 100% at the time but a lot of my problems stemmed because of me because the borderline personality disorder that I had other people don't have it I have to admit the problem was amid within me and once we can do that we can then start moving forward with the other stats so I'm gonna leave that there today guys but I'll be back I just don't know what and I hope what we Black Friday for you and ah a massive thank you to all of you I reach 10,000 subscribers and it was so exciting and I literally well I can do without you and I just want you to know how very very grateful I am so thank you and uh yeah I'll be back in the week love you guys bye
This transcript was auto-generated and therefore may contain mistakes.